10minuteHR

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Be a Better Influencer by Listening More: 9 Tips

“I can’t get my team on board with the new company-wide change initiative. I keep telling them how it makes sense for us, but I just can’t convince them.. The resistance is huge.”

“My boss seems to rubbish all my suggestions. No matter how hard I try to explain my ideas, in the end they always get rejected.”

“At the yearly budgeting meeting, I get the impression that my department’s interest always comes last.”

If any of these issues sound familiar, the chances are that your influencing skills need some improvement.

Does it mean that you should use better arguments? Should you try to present your points more strongly in order convince others? The answer is, probably not.

Influencing by listening

In my experience, in 90% of cases like these it is not a lack of effective arguments that prevents managers from influencing others successfully, but – somewhat counterintuitively – it is a lack of listening skills. Read More

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Turn your phone off, don’t let the magic go

The other day I heard a song on the radio which I haven’t heard for about 25 years.

The thing is, when I last heard this song as a kid, I didn’t speak much English, so all I could understand was “Susana, Susana”. Now, however, I can follow the lyrics and my first thought is:

Why the hell did he pick up the phone?

(For those of you who don’t know the song, or are too professional to listen to it during working hours, here is the short summary of the story: The guy is having the perfect romantic moment with Susana. Just then the phone rings. He picks up only to find out that it was a wrong call. By the time he returns to the girl the “magic is gone, it is a disaster”. In fact, she soon gets up to leave.)

No wonder the magic is gone! You picked up the stupid phone!  What did you expect?

I feel like saying the same thing to many managers who keep multitasking, picking up phones, sending texts and trying to hold a conversation simultaneously. Read More